On Friday my students had an assembly in the morning called, "Peacemakers". Teachers were told that this would be a presentation to our classes on how they could handle conflict. Whenever you get a large number of kids in one room for multiple hours conflicts definitely arise. They are little humans that are discovering their emotions and personalities for the first time. Developmentally they are just on the cusp of being able to grasp the concept of different perspectives. Many of them can't understand the idea of seeing something from someone else's point of view- or thinking about someone else's feelings. It's not because their rude, it's simply because of their age and brain development.
All year I have spent many a lessons teaching about positivity, kindness, and how to work as a family each day. However, my students are only human and there is still conflict present. I thought that this assembly might provide a new tool that we could incorporate into the classroom.
The presenter was a very nice young woman and she based her speech around the concept of a balloon. She said that we have all balloons that we carry around and whenever we experience a bad feeling our balloon gets filled up. She had students list bad emotions that they experience such as when they hear their parents fight or when someone does something to them that they don't like. She drew a picture on the board of a massive red balloon and wrote all of these negative feelings into the drawing. Next, she had the students discuss ways they could release the emotions from their balloon so that it didn't get too big or pop. They listed things like exercise, taking deep breaths, playing sports, or talking to a friend. Then......her presentation was over. That's it. You feel bad feelings, then let them out.
As I walked my 5-6 year old students back to our room I couldn't help but feel there was something missing from that assembly. I listened to them as they shared answers, describing how their parents have broken up or how sometimes they get really angry or scared. My sweet littles are already feeling such intense emotions at this age. They are just coming into the world and learning how to deal with everything that goes on around them. They may be young- but they are smart. They observe everything and it is through this that they develop their vocabulary, attitudes, and emotions. They learn how to cope by watching people around them- and from the adults that I've seen some of us don't know how to cope ourselves.
I thought back to all of my readings and wondered how I could provide this message to my students. Obviously, I teach in public school so religion, biases, and other spiritual ideals are a no no to share. But in this moment I had to do something- we had to talk about this. Our next 45 minutes was scheduled for our math lesson, but instead I threw it out the window.
I pulled my kiddos to the carpet and recapped the lesson that had just been taught. I pulled out a large piece of chart paper and drew the same red balloon that the woman had. We re-listed all of the negative emotions that had come up and further discussed things you could do to release them. "Yes", I said, "there are some bad emotions and if you don't let them out they will boil up to a point where you might feel like you will explode." So...we do things to get them out. BUT what comes next? Here is the part that I felt like was missing. That whole assembly had focused on bad feelings...bad bad bad....that feels hurtful, that feels scary, that makes you angry. We just spent 30 minutes talking to our subconscious brains about what feels bad. NOW.....it's time to flood them with the good.
I told my students that not only would we release the bad feelings but we would replace them with feelings we like. We briefly discussed how they feel each morning when they wake up. Are they thinking about how sleepy they are? Or are they excited to learn something new at school? We talked about how each morning they could make a choice of how they were going to feel. If they woke up in a sour mood and only focused on things they didn't like, chances are they wouldn't feel so good the rest of the day. But...if they could wake up and be happy about something, then they would have a better chance of feeling great all day!
Next, I had them give me positive words and I wrote them outside of the balloon picture that I recreated on chart paper. They came up with things like joy, happy, excited, surprises, kindness, grateful, cheerful, friends, love, and many more. Then, we talked about things that we do that bring us those feelings. Again, they had quite a long list for me. Some that came up were: music, dancing, laughing, playing with pets, getting hugs, looking at flowers, making art, and so on.
These little people..these 5 and 6 year olds who can't tie their shoes and can barely remember their lunch boxes...are filled with so many emotions already. Who is going to teach them how to tap into their infinite knowledge?
To end the lesson I had the students create happiness posters. They worked in teams and had one large piece of chart paper. They then drew all of the positive words we had discussed with pictures to match. I allowed them to use markers (a treat) and played uplifting music. Many of them asked if they could dance while they worked- and many of them did. I told the students we would display these all over the room so that we could be reminded of those good feelings even when we are feeling bad.
We had 30 minutes of pure joy and excitement in our classroom. My students loved this lesson so much that when it was time to go to lunch they groaned. When we returned they were going to do free friday centers (where they get to pick anything to play with- a special time) and instead they requested more time to work on their happiness posters.
I think sometimes when we are learning to cope with the rough emotions, we forget to give equal..no it should be double...attention to the good feelings. I once heard someone say in a TED talk that stress management workshops can actually cause more stress because all you are doing is talking about the stressful things.
I think one of the greatest gifts I can give my students for the rest of the year is to continue to bring joy into our classroom wherever I can. I may not be able to explicitly tell them about Murphy and the power of their subconscious mind, but I can be a model. I can provide opportunities for love, joy and a better understanding of positivity.
Love this! Darkness is nothing more than an absence of light... Don't dwell on the darkness... Turn on the light!
ReplyDelete